or anything but running, apparently.
I would love to say this is going to be an inspirational post (cause I need some, pretty please) I'm just not sure where it's going to go, so I cannot make any promises. I'm going to dump it all here and see where we're at when I'm done!
Before I start, congrats to all the Disneyland Dumbo Double Dare runners yesterday! It was so much fun watching everyone from afar. Happy Labor Day as well.
I woke up ready to run! I had no pain at all this weekend, I'm not uncomfortable at all when I'm walking around in flip flops, it's like I'm not even injured...until I put my shoe on. Ugh. I was so excited but as soon as I slipped on my shoe, the heel was burning. WTF? I took the shoe back off and after cursing and putting my flip flop back on, I headed out to petsit. I was in a REALLY foul mood. I looked like this: (note, this is a reenactment so it may have been much uglier, you would have to ask Dallas. LOL)
When I was done (petsitting & pouting), Dallas suggested we bike instead of trying to run. I was pretty close to running in my flip flop, so it took some convincing. Eventually I relented and this is how I rode...
At some point Dallas told me to slow down, I was so frustrated that I guess I was taking it out on our ride and he wanted to go for distance, not speed. I realized as I got lost in my music that I was playing with the idea of running when we got back to the house. It was going to take quite a few more miles to convince me that I shouldn't. So I kept riding.
We stopped by the house around 10 miles for a drink of water and I knew if I didn't get right back on the bike that I would be off running in my flip flop...so I kept riding.
At some point I WAS enjoying the ride, I do like biking sometimes, but I don't get the same feeling when I'm biking as I do when running. Around mile 14 I had exhausted myself enough that I thought I might be able to finish up the ride and not try to run when I got back to the house. We made it home at 16.3 miles, lots of hills thrown in, and my bum was sore and my legs like jello, but I still felt a bit like this:
It's just.not.the.same.
Jeez, here come the waterworks. Running is my happy place. It's not about the sweat or the workout, there's something more there. I go deep in myself, I am ONE with myself, my breath, my feet pounding the ground. It's like meditation and there's just no other activity that makes me feel the way running does. It seems cruel that I can't do it and that injuries seem to plague me.
Sigh. So, Miss-overly-dramatic has to deal. First World problems, I tell ya. There are so many things to be grateful for, including the 16 mile bike ride I was just able to take! It's not the same, but it's something. It's more than something, more than lots of people can do. I have been described as a pretty persistent person. I guess I am, I think because I don't feel I have any other choice. What choice do I have? Give up? and do what? Sit here and pout more? So, I'll keep swimming... or I'll keep riding and I'll do whatever I can until I can run again. I WILL run again, because to me, there's just no other alternative. And my face most of the time is going to be like this:
I'll fake it until I make it and persist until I get what I want. I'll run in flip flops down Main Street and through that castle if I have to, but I'm going to run my race!
This just came to me...
ReplyDeleteWait first, I want to hug you! Don't be sad :(
Have you looked into going for a more barefoot shoe? Maybe less cushioning pushing on your heel would work?
And just think about it this way you are still working on the muscles you need to run, and you are building muscle instead of sitting around and moping :) Think about all the positives!
And hey, if you plan on flip flop running I'll be right there with you! <3
Meg! <3
DeleteYes, I have some vibrams! I cannot get them on, however. What hurts on my heel is the bottom back part of it, right where your shoe pushes when you slip it on. The vibrams are actually even harder to get on than my regular shoe b/c you have to push your foot into it. I already have a 4mm drop minimal shoe, it seems to just be this bursa area on my heel that is inflamed and it doesn't even hurt until something touches it. Just frustrating!
Thanks for the hug, I'm feeling a bit better this afternoon. I need to just focus on whatever cross training I can, it cannot stay this way forever, right???
We just got my preschooler a bike and I ended up running around the block chasing the little speed demon in my flip flops. Let's just say I don't recommend it! I hate that you're dealing with this frustrating issue, you know the drill - ice, advil, have you tried taping it? I do know what you mean about the meditative nature of running, it's relaxing to me both mentally and physically somehow. That's why running injuries make me a little bit (my family would say a lot) crazy. Hope it heals soon, good for you on recognizing that you were going to run and wearing yourself out first!
ReplyDeleteI taped it for the Superhero race and it seemed to help a bit, but this morning I put tape on it too and as soon as I slipped the shoe on, it burned. I am sore this afternoon already from that bike ride, so that's making me feel a bit better! LOL...it's like I need to push myself to soreness to feel like I got a "real" workout when I don't run. I'm assuming in between the toes would blister at some point if running in flip flops! I'm determined to at least cross train well if I can't run, so tomorrow it's arms! :)
Delete=( So sad for you but at least you are able to get out there and do something! Keep your head up!
ReplyDeleteThanks Cassie! I'm workin on it! :)
Deleteyou know i think you are an absolute inspiration!
ReplyDeletethat being said... have you been to the dr yet? if not, it is about time to get yourself to an orthopedic.
Thanks Amy. No Dr. for me, we don't have insurance. I'm nearly 100% sure it's heel bursitis, it does not fit the symptoms of achilles and I'm pretty sure they would just tell me to RICE it anyway. I am guessing if I completely rested for 2-3 weeks with no activity, it would get better, but I just can't, I seriously get depressed and lethargic if I don't do some type of movement, so cross training it will be!
Deletethen you and i are in a similar boat. can you get yourself to a med supply store that might be able to fit you for a walking boot? that would give you the compression you might need and the rest, but still allow you to move around a bit. its not pretty, but you seriously dont want to end up where i've been for the past month. fix it early. i know you get lethargic and depressed when not running (me too), but sometimes you have to take a break. keep on keeping on with the bike. but rest that running foot.
DeleteI don't think a boot will help for this injury, I think it's a matter of rest (which you are right, I just need to DO so that I can get better). Anything that pushes/compresses/touches it, makes it hurt, but movement does not. I'm feeling pretty ok with cross training at the moment, so I'm trying to hold onto that! :)
DeleteKeep up the smile! You can get through this :) Maybe all the cross-training will make you come back better and stronger!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Lauren, that's my hope!
DeleteSorry for the problems you're still having Karen, but I wanted to comment on where you said that maybe totally resting for 2-3 weeks with no activity might help you but you don't want to do that??? Well, I think what you are doing is EXACTLY what you should be doing. Even if you did go to the doctor, a good Sports med doc would NEVER tell you to rest completely. What they tell you do to is cross train; activities that do not injure or aggrevate the area, but keep you strong, conditioned and in shape. I knew I found my 'soul mate' doctor when I walked into him and, after giving him my long history of injuries and surgeries, I said "please DON'T tell me not to run, I'm already signed up for the PHM and I AM doing it". . . he looked at me and said "Sharon, I"m a SPORTS DOCTOR. . my job is to KEEP you active, not to tell you don't do anything! And for one, I would NEVER tell you not to run, you just need to start training correctly." You need to get out of your head and just consider what you are doing now is actually going to make you a BETTER runner in the long run (see how I slipped that pun in???) ;-) The first run back will be difficult, but you get it back VERY quickly (it's not like starting over), I've been there and I know, with your determination, you will be FINE!!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Sharon, this helps. I am super worried about losing everything I have worked for, I remember how hard it used to be to run just 3 miles and it took me quite a while to get to 4, I was kind of stuck. I'm going to focus on cross training and keep my chin up!
DeleteKaren - you are an inspiration! I love your simple, true love for running. You have a great outlook on the situation, which will only help you in the long run (no pun intended...). I hope you're able to get back to your happy place soon. I tore my ACL a few years back and was sidelined for about a year. I know how hard it can be to sit back and "rest" but please know that what you're doing is good for your body and your mind. It's all a balancing act. Happy running!
ReplyDeleteThanks Jewell! I'm glad you replied, I subbed to your blog with Bloglovin'! I was out with plantar fasciitis for about 10 months, but it was when I first started back up running and I didn't LOVE it the way I do now. I just seem to be so emotionally tied to my running that it's hard not to be depressed when I cannot run. I've watched so many people go through it too, it's nice to know I'm not alone!
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